Things I Put In My Husband's Lunch
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Bonus Note #29 / Husband draws #6

11/7/2018

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In response to my practice of constantly photoshopping dumb things into his computer backgrounds, he decided to turn the tables and mess with my background image while I wasn't looking.

[shoujo image of the moon framed by crystals on one side, and Sailor Moon surrounded in roses on the other. Husband has added a chocolate cake in the center, and a heart floating over her head, so it looks like she is gazing with longing at the dessert, instead of just pensively looking off in the distance as in the original]
shoujo image of the moon framed by crystals on one side, and Sailor Moon surrounded in roses on the other. Husband has added a chocolate cake in the center, and a heart floating over her head, so it looks like she is gazing with longing at the dessert, instead of just pensively looking off in the distance as in the original
Get you a spouse that looks at you the way Usagi looks at cake
Original image credit goes to http://andain.minitokyo.net/
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Bonus Note #28

11/1/2018

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Another round of doodles on Ziploc bags.
"Popcorn" spelled out on pieces of popping corn
Rad 90's Guy saying
Rad 90's Guy saying "It's your birthday? Cowabunga Dude!"
It says
It says "carrots," but there is only a lone sad carrot depicted.
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Bonus Note #27

10/26/2018

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My husband sets up a rotating display of Star Trek action figures on top of his office bookshelf. Here are a series of reasons why he should never leave them unattended. (spoiler: it's mostly hats)
New Borg agenda: heavy drinking and fancy origami party helmets
New Borg agenda: heavy drinking and fancy origami party helmets
The latest in interstellar fashion: electronic devices as headgear
The latest in interstellar fashion: electronic devices as headgear
The real
The real "Picard Maneuver" is doing the limbo
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Bonus Note #26

10/21/2018

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Here are two joke maps.

The first is from a D&D game my husband ran several years ago: As play progressed, he slowly unveiled what awaited us in the Tower of Horrors, yet at the end of the first play session we still had a large chunk of the map left unexplored. I decided to preemptively fill in the blank areas with things such as a secret door leading to the Bifröst, a tarp ("It's a tarp!"), an in-game reference to Sam & Max's "Just You And Me (And Ted E. Bear)", a day spa complete with a rubber duck filled bubble bath and a half-giant sized massage table, and a room full of magical kittens. We ultimately got none of those things.
What happens when players fill in the D&D map for the DM
Minotaurs. We just got minotaurs. And a redcap shopkeeper.
I don't know why I drew this second map, or what it was in reference to, but it also has secret kittens. Other highlights include an area with a save point and no enemies, an area one does not go, certain doom, lots of big treasure, and one place with "Ehh, okay treasure, I guess..."
Every map needs secret kittens
I drew a clear starting point, but there is no exit.
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Bonus Note #25

10/14/2018

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A series of images from his 31st birthday, in which I pulled out all the stops. I set up an elaborate treasure hunt, I decorated with the finest accessories the Dollar Store had to offer, and I had a grand surprise waiting for him at the end of the trail.

(click images to view full size)
treasure hunt introduction and clue #1, hanging on the front door
ceramic trinket dish and clue #2, on his bedside table
gnome plush and clue #3, on guest bed
glow in the dark dinosaurs and clue #4, found in fridge
Tron Bonne figurine and clue #5, on top of TV
holographic cat stickers and clue #6, in computer drawer
super colorful party decorations in dining area / living room
closeup on "31" party candles
top row, left to right
1. Two notes hang under the "Happy Place" sign on our front door:
A birthday hunt awaits you here. 6 gifts are hidden somewhere near. Follow clues around the house until you find your loving spouse.

Clue #1: Though small I'll catch your cares with ease. Start out where you rest your keys.

2. The first prize is a small ceramic trinket dish resting on his bedside table. It is inscribed, "pray more. worry less."
Clue #2: No need for Travelocity where I roam, I'm in the guest room of your home.

3. The next gift is a gnome plush with a big hat and super long legs, lounging on top of the guest bed.
Clue #3: You'll never miss us in the dark. We're prowling where you keep your Quark. (the cheese, not the ferengi)

4. Gift three is a bundle of various glow in the dark dinosaur toys including one Grow and Glow figurine, and a two-pack of dinosaur bone model kits. I wrapped them in tissue paper and hid them in the fridge.
Clue #4: DASH now to the TV screen. There I'll greet you "bween, bween, bweeeeen!"

bottom row, left to right
1. On top of the TV is perched treasure four, an imported figurine of Tron Bonne using a servbot as a chair.
Clue #5: In the top drawer by your computer, waits a litter than couldn't be cuter.

2. The next prize, found in his computer desk drawer, is a package of holographic kitten stickers.
Clue #6: In the office a treasure find. Learn to see what once was blind.

{insert minor explanatory detour}
The whole time he had been on an adventure quest around the house, I had been silently hiding in my office with The Big Gift.

As many of you know, my husband is colorblind. He considers it his only party trick, but I know there are times he wishes he could see the intricacies and vibrancy in color that everyone else around him experiences. So I bought him a set of EnChroma glasses, which aid in filtering color perception for people with colorblindness, often allowing them to experience certain hues for the first time. I was expecting them to blow his mind.

Unfortunately, the glasses did not end up doing as much as I'd hoped. While certain things, like his plaid shirts, registered as noticeably different, it was more of a "Huh, that's kind of cool. This shirt looks less dull than usual" and not a tearful "Green! I can see green! Look at this shirt! Have you ever seen a more wonderful shirt in all creation?!" Most things looked more or less the same. Sadly, we ultimately ended up returning the glasses at the end of the trial period because we just couldn't justify the price tag for the little they did for his specific condition.
{end detour}

3.+4. Long view and closeup of the party decorations. I splurged on every bright and colorful thing I could find, hoping to give him plenty of fodder for his new glasses to soak in: multi-colored paper stars, paper streamers, a hot pink princess tablecloth, rainbow candles, two different Happy Birthday banners, a hoard of balloons, and a generous smattering of dice. Even though the glasses didn't work out, we had fun pelting each other with balloons for the next few weeks.
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Bonus Note #24

10/7/2018

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A dumb joke photoshop I made for my husband of a screenshot from Mega Man 10 enhanced with additional Spikes/Spykes and a Megaman-branded light bulb.

References include Rugrats, Buffy, Cowboy Bebop, Spike TV, Spike Lee, X-Men: Evolution, Tom and Jerry, Space Quest V, The Land Before Time, and Dick Tracy.
MM10 level, now with more Spikes/Spykes
"Spike formation, engage! ...TOO SPIKEY!"
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Bonus Note #23

9/30/2018

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Here are various images from Valentine's Days of yore.
Heart-shaped breakfast foods
Heart-shaped scrambled eggs, ham, and toast. No heart-shaped milk, though.
Laminated cut-paper heart-shaped envelope
A laminated heart-shaped construction paper envelope
Poetical romantic quotes
A series of poetical romantic quotes from famous people, followed by my dumb attempt.
[famous people be like: "There's this place in me where your fingerprints still rest, your kisses still linger, and your whispers softly echo. It's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me" - Gretchen Kemp

and then there's me: "I Love you more than cats, donuts, space, dinosaurs, Cinnabon, David Bowie, Star Trek, anime, baby dragons, books, or sleep, so you know that I really truly love you." - Your Wife]

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Bonus Note #22

9/26/2018

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Speaking of things I leave on his computer for him to find, here is an example of other dumb things I do to surprise him...
photograph of a large pink stuffed elephant wearing a hat with cat ears, posed to look like it is sitting at his desk using his computer
large elephant plushie wearing cat ears, posed to look like it is using his desktop computer
closeup on screen with an open Word document that reads
closeup on screen where an open Word document reads "I am a cat. meow, meow, meow"
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Bonus Note #21

9/21/2018

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Okay, that's the last of the "specifically drawn to be annoying" posts. There are still a few digital notes lined up for this week, but they are regular weird as opposed to desktop-clutter weird.

As a palate-cleanser, here are a few pictures from our first "Fishmas" celebration.

We've had Chintzy Blue, our belovedly-tacky Christmas tree, for almost a decade now, but in 2015 we finally decided to use its color to full advantage and adopt an underwater theme for our holiday decor. I handmade the starfish tree topper, which, while thematically appropriate, isn't quite as fun as either the "dead Harry Potter angel" I previously made out of cut paper, or the "Dr. Wily with floating coat action" figurine we used for the first few years.

[photo of Chintzy Blue lit up. Along with the starfish topper, it has a "sand" tree skirt adorned with collected shells, and various fish, boat, penguin, buoy, lure, seahorse, and stingray ornaments]
Nautical-themed Christmas tree
The Totoro cast is excited, the Blue Seed cast is horrified, and the Jedi wants to chop it down.
Christmas wreath with ornaments
We bought a wreath to hold our fave non-nautical ornaments (geekery, cats, family gifts, etc)
Gift wrap for
gift wrap for "The Silly Gift," with hand-cut paper cat embellishments (cats love Fishmas)
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Bonus Note #20

9/10/2018

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The next few weeks are going to be an exercise in inanity and absurdity, with a series of speed-drawn digital joke doodles that make scribbling look like fine art.

Before we get into that, though, here are a few pictures from our 4th anniversary celebration back in 2015...

[front sides of the cards we made for each other]
His is a computer printout of the abrian monster ("ostrich with arms") as it appears in the D&D 3.0 "Fiend Folio."
Mine is a colored pencil drawing on brown cardstock depicting a maple tree being tapped for syrup.
photo of the front sides of both greeting cards
[insides of the two cards]
His:
"Being with you gives me all sorts of warm, fuzzy emutions.
...sorry; I guess that was a bit of ostrich.
Happy 4th Anniversary!
Love, Nathaniel"

Mine:
"Just another "sappy" anniversary card...
Love, Wiffy"
photo of the greeting cards' interiors
[photo of the dinner table with it's white brocade tablecloth, white lace table runner, fancy place settings, decorative garden-themed candle arrangements, and assortment of homemade pastie pastries]
photo of the dinner table
[closeup on one of the place settings. It has a polished bamboo placemat topped with an embellished blue ceramic plate. In the center of the plate sits a green napkin folded into a rose, and adorned with cut paper leaves. Around the sides are silver spiral cutlery, a square-sided glass, and an ornamental miniature origami crane]
photo of a place setting
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    My name is Shannon, and I draw silly things.

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